What makes you you? What are the characteristics that your friends would say are typical for you? If somebody had a way to measure all these and combine them, would they be able to derive a personality type that actually reflects your true self?
Tests like the one on the popular website 16 Personalities claim they can. There you answer a series of questions and get a four letter acronym. Each letter represents a personality aspect as a two sided continuum, like introversion (I) on one side, and extraversion (E) on the other. The middle is neutral. Depending on the letter combination, you get one of 16 types that is supposed to reflect your personality. 1This test uses the typology of the famous Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, but is actually based on the Big Five Model, which is the standard model in psychology and social research.
According to the test, I am INFP, which they call the Mediator:
Mediator personalities are true idealists, always looking for the hint of good in even the worst of people and events, searching for ways to make things better.
This is, to put it carefully, probably not totally off.
But I want to be an Architect
I like how I am. But sometimes I can’t help wishing I was different. Sometimes I would love to be able to focus on getting things done instead of making sure everybody in the room is doing okay. I recently read that Derek Sivers, one of my heroes, is classified as INTJ – the Architect:
People with this personality type are imaginative yet decisive… ambitious yet like their privacy… curious about everything but remain focused.
I would love to be an Architect! They build stuff: websites, buildings, companies, movements. I am full of ideas but am usually too distracted by new things on the horizon to remain focused long enough.
Comparing our profiles I noticed that Derek and I share the first two letters. We are both introverted and intuitive. I’m starting to think: how much would it take to change the last two and become an Architect like him?
This, of course, raises the question: How much can people change? Can we tinker with our personalities at all? The very definition of personality includes that the characteristics have to be stable over a longer period of time – possibly life.
On the other hand, we are what we repeatedly do. The author James Clear writes in his book Atomic Habits:
“Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become. No single instance will transform your beliefs, but as the votes build up, so too does the evidence of your new identity.”
Which means as soon as you manage to behave differently, you could change. We should be able to re-engineer our personality, right? 2I know behavior is not something you just change. But let’s, for the sake of this thought experiment, assume it’s fairly easy.
The transformation experiment
So let’s do this! What do I have to do to leave my old self behind and morph into a beautiful… Architect?
Step one: thinking instead of feeling
Let’s look at the two personality aspects in question. Letter three is about how we make decisions and cope with emotions.
- As a feeling individual, I am “more empathic and less competitive and focus on harmony and social cooperation”.
- To become thinking, I should concentrate on “objectivity and rationality, hide my feelings and see efficiency as more important than social cooperation”.
This leaves me a bit confused. It’s true that I’m obsessed with harmony. But then I have also never been accused of overtly showing my feelings. One might even say I’m quite bad at that. Also, it is really important to me to explain the world through a rational lens, which means I have a really low tolerance for pseudo-science and any kind of mumbo jumbo.
I really don’t see any way of being more thinking, if I’m honest. Maybe the last letter offers more possibilities for change.
Step two: judging instead of prospecting
The fourth personality aspect is about how we approach work, planning and decision-making.
- As a prospecting individual, I’m apparently “very good at improvising and spotting opportunities” and “tend to be flexible, relaxed nonconformists who prefer keeping their options open.”
But… I really, really like that about myself.
I know it probably leads to me being scatterbrained at times and starting things that I don’t finish. But it is also very much my way of life and it has led me to become the person I am today. And it has the potential to lead me to some more very exciting places.
- Judging individuals, like the Architect, on the other hand, are “decisive, thorough and highly organized”. They “value clarity and predictability, preferring structure and planning to spontaniety.”
Oh boy. Yes, I would like to have these. But I’m not gonna start working to get them. Why? Because that’s what I’ve been doing for close to two decades now! Seriously. My deep desire to be more in control of things has led to an obsession with personal productivity and organization that’s still very much alive today.
Also, it worked. My obsession has actually made me very organized – precisely because it wasn’t my natural state. Is it part of my actual personality now, even though I wasn’t born with it? Does it even matter?
We are not two-dimensional
I’m learning several things from this experiment. First: Personality tests are fun and they can give you some food for thought. But they’re very limited in displaying human beings in all their complexity. Some things that seem mutually exclusive don’t have to be. You can be chaotic in some ways and organized in others. Just because you’re rational doesn’t mean you can’t be empathetic. 3 This is also why more recent research doesn’t focus on general personality traits. A newer theory proposes “behavioural signatures” -that people have stable patterns of behaviours, but these vary depending on the situation.
It also becomes clear that, at least in my case, we have an awareness of which characteristics we don’t have but desire. And this will drive our behaviour, making us do things to change and improve.
But please don’t be too hard on yourself, and practice some self love; as a Mediator, I feel for you and want you to be well. Trying to engineer your personality like this is probably also a pretty dumb idea. But, as an Architect, I can’t help it.
Despite the doubt: These tests are really fun. Try it: Click this link and take the 16 Personalities test. What type are you? Do you agree? What would you change about yourself if you could?
This is you: 😊