The Honeymoon Phase is Over

I know I should get up, but it’s so nice and warm in my bed. I’ve slept for way too long and there are things I need to take care of. I know it won’t be so bad once I’m up. But not right now, ok? Five more minutes.

The bed is actually my apartment and getting up is the world out there.

Funnily enough, after initially feeling trapped and locked up, I’ve gotten so used to the comforts of home that the thought of going back to the busy life doesn’t feel very desirable any more.

Here in Switzerland, the lockdown has been mostly lifted. Quite a few people are under the impression that the worst of this pandemic is behind us. Peeking out from under my blanket, I’m not so sure.

The phases of disaster

Whenever there’s a disaster that affects a big group of people, the community goes through a collective trauma process together. A training manual of the US Department of Health and Human Services describes four typical phases:

  1. Heroic Phase: This phase usually occurs directly after the disaster, when heroic actions are taken to help people recover from and/or survive a disaster.
  2. Honeymoon Phase: In this phase people draw together to solve problems in an intense showing of community. Media interest is intense during this phase. This phase generally lasts from one week to six months.
  3. Disillusionment Phase: People begin to get a mentality of “everyone for himself” when delays and other issues common with disaster set in. About this time media interest begins to fade and blame is assigned. This phase could extend from two months to one or more years.
  4. Reconstruction Phase: People start to pull together again to get things done, delays in the process continue to garner negative feelings and reactions. The media may revisit the disaster at this time (one-year anniversaries, etc.)

Chances are that we are at the end of the COVID-19 Honeymoon Phase, right at the brink of Disillusionment – or maybe we’re already there.

A line graph that shows the phases of disaster.
(Source: Zunin & Myers)

The unity is crumbling

We saw phases one and two happening. People started running errands for their vulnerable neighbours. Videos of people in Italy singing and making music on their balconies sent shivers down our spines. Whole cities applauded for health care workers. “Stay healthy” became a standard goodbye. There was a solemn sense of we’re all in this together.

But the voices criticising the lockdown are getting louder, calling it unneccessary because, see, no overwhelmed hospitals. Nevermind that it was very likely because of the lockdown that the hospitals are still functional. There is blame and accusation. People go to the streets every week to protest the government measures. The unity is crumbling.

This is most likely just the beginning. The Disillusionment Phase will go on for a while, and it may get worse.

It seems counteruintuitive, but the lockdown was actually the easy part! Things were clear: Stay home, don’t see anybody. It’s what the writer Thomas Pueyo called the Hammer. But now follows the Dance, where we have to find a way back to some sort of normalcy alongside the virus. At least until we have a vaccine, which could take one and a half years, or longer, or there could be no vaccine at all.

Can we hug our grandparents?

These will be times full of ambiguity and uncertainty. How many different people should we see? Should we shake hands? What about our parents and grandparents? Can we hug them again? Or should we see them but keep our distance? In what situations should we wear masks?

What about businesses that are open again but things are going badly? In Switzerland, employees of closed restaurants got money from the government. But what if people are just too hesitant to go to restaurants and the costs for running them are too high? People might lose their job, businesses will be closed.

What if the number of infections goes up again? Will we be ready to go into a lockdown again? I have a feeling some people might not be very open to that idea.

It seems inevitable that there will be Disillusionment and a lot of negative feelings. But as a dumb little blogger fellow human being I want to remind you that it is okay to feel frustrated, uncertain and scared. It is normal, it is part of our collective process. Be kind to yourself and your fellow humans.

Because this, too, shall pass. The Reconstruction Phase is on the horizon, where we pull together and rebuild.

I think I’m ready to get up now. Just give me five more minutes.

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